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Feel taken advantage of

7K views 47 replies 37 participants last post by  CardPuncher 
#1 ·
Alright not really me but feel like a family member was anyways.

My wife's dad recently sold his ruger 10/22 magnum for $150. I know the guy who bought it and have been thinking about saying something to him. They guy knew what he was buying too, which makes me feel worse.

My FIL didn't know what these are going for, and I haven't told him.

So do I say something or just let him be?
 
#2 ·
Sorry to say that after the fact is the wrong time to ask what something is worth. I feel for you, because as my parents got older, they were taken advantage of by a young woman they befriended. They sold her a '66 Mustang for $1,000, and she resold it the very next day for a huge profit. You can try talking to the buyer about it, but don't expect anything to come of it. Regards.
 
#3 ·
I don't see anything wrong with saying something to the buyer, since you know him. Could be something light like "You really scored on Pop's rifle". To which he can gloat, look a little embarrassed, or (unlikely) offer to adjust the price. Or it could be "Next time you're going to rip off the old man you let me know first or we're going to have a problem". Or anything in between, depending on you and him.

But unless you're never going to see him again I wouldn't let it go or you'll be angry at him the rest of your life. No matter what he says, you don't ever have to trust him. It's always good to know who people like that are.
 
#6 ·
Since you know the guy I'd say something and get it out in the open & off your chest. He'll either tell you to take a leap OR make it right. Either way you can clear the air. BS by the way on giving $150 for that rifle. I'm as much for a good deal as the next guy but not about to resort to stealing from the elderly! If I were in your shoes I'd talk to the guy about it for sure.
 
#7 ·
Water under the bridge the way I see it. My parents are in their 70s now. They give me fits when it comes to stuff like that. But, it usually pertains to things like spending rather than selling. I have told them many times if they are unsure of what something actually costs, to call me, but they never do and end up spending 4 to 5 times more than necessary. I think it is an attempt to still show they are self-sufficient and able to make their own decisions, albeit very poor ones. I have since washed my hands of them on stuff like that, because they are not going to change their ways.

I think if you tell your FIL what you think about the transaction, it won't accomplish much good. He might be like my parents and feel that it is his business and not yours. But, you can tell him if he ever sells anything else to let you know because you are knowledgeable on prices and may can get him a better deal than he realizes.

If he is like my parents, he will do what he wants to do, no matter what you say.
 
#8 ·
Alright not really me but feel like a family member was anyways.

My wife's dad recently sold his ruger 10/22 magnum for $150. I know the guy who bought it and have been thinking about saying something to him. They guy knew what he was buying too, which makes me feel worse.

My FIL didn't know what these are going for, and I haven't told him.

So do I say something or just let him be?
Caveat emptor.
 
#9 · (Edited)
Still a sleazy move by a "friend". I see this way too much.

My pet peeve is one shooter selling another a defective firearm without being up front that there is a problem.

I have always seen shooters as group that take care of each other not ripping off old guys like that. It would be hard for me to not say SOMETHING to him about it to ensure it does not happen again if nothing else. We should be more honorable than that.

When I first came to RFC there was two threads about guys bragging about how they "got over" on another shooter. Even though I was new here I had to give them a hard time for being such.....well this is a family forum so I can not use the words I want to:eek::eek:

I guess this is one of the things that keeps me away from gun shows. I have heard two of 40calcritter's customers that are regular gunshow guys say "Well if you can't fix it I'll just take it to the (fill in the blank) gunshow and sell it there. I will not be going back to that one for months." wink wink. Because they are not my customers and I am in his shop I have to bite my tongue but I have lost all respect for those two guys.

I have cut up two guns with a hacksaw rather than sell a defective, unfixable gun to someone else.

We should treat each other with more honor than that and to take advantage of an older person makes it even worse.
 
#10 ·
What to do.

My take would be to say something in a non-confrontational manner to the buyer, see how he responds, and proceed from there. He may be feeling guilty about it or he may be just a snake. Then, and more importantly, make the point to your FIL that you and his daughter might like to have the first shot at whatever he might be getting rid of.
 
#41 ·
Exactly right!

Exactly right!
:harry:
My take would be to say something in a non-confrontational manner to the buyer, see how he responds, and proceed from there. He may be feeling guilty about it or he may be just a snake. Then, and more importantly, make the point to your FIL that you and his daughter might like to have the first shot at whatever he might be getting rid of.
 
#11 ·
Two possibilities, either the buyer knew the value or he did not. If you know that he knew the value but took advantage of the situation, there is no point in confronting him as he knows he did wrong and has no ethics on the matter. If, on the other hand, he might not have known it was worth much more, then a polite conversation might convince him to rescind the deal and pay up. It all depends on that...good luck and sorry for your FIL's misfortune.
 
#12 ·
Back around 2000 or so, an elderly member of the club was trying to sell a pristine Winchester lever gun that belonged to the widow of his departed friend in .348 for $250. I and all the other members passed on it. I knew that was too low.
 
#13 ·
I know an 84 year old man that has a couple of WW2 guns. He said he was thinking of selling them and I told him they were worth more than I could pay for them. I told him where to take them to get a fair appraisal and to consign them. It ticks me off when I see someone especially a senior get take advantage of by a supposed friend.
 
#16 ·
Vincent
I say whats on my mind and that is Bull Sh#$
I would be on the phone or in his face asking WHY DID YOU RIP OFF MY FATHER IN-LAW ???

if he says I wanted to give him $300 but he only wanted $150
then you know if not I would ask for the gun back or more money

BUT I would not say anything my Pops why hurt his feeling

Rick
 
#17 ·
YOU were not taken advantage of. Not the way I read it. But since you seem to be speaking on behalf of your wife's father:

This was a test of character. The buyer failed. Your FIL was a victim, not a participant. Now it's your move.

I'm older than your FIL. The biggest regrets we have in life are often things we didn't do, not the things we did.
 
#21 ·
There are a lot of right answers here and a couple missing the mark. JMHO,make an offer to buy the rifle, if he is willing to sell it for not too much profit, he is not the bad guy here. If he does not want to sell it and wants to use it, just consider it went to a good home.

If your FIL knew the guy, he may have just wanted him to have it without making a gift out of it. I have done that several times. Knowing someone wants or needs something, but also knowing they would not accept as a gift or charity, so then you just make it a deal or affordable to them.

Anyway it a done deal, there was a offer to sell and a offer to buy.
 
#23 ·
Tough decision. I would feel the same as you do about the situation. I would be back and forth on what to do.

After reading through the thread I agree with 52DH&R12. If I could afford it I would buy it back if he offers to sell it. Personally, I would let him make the profit and then say your peace. That way you have the rifle back and know what the guy was out to do all along. This is one of those times I would spend some cash if available.

If he doesn't want to sell it at least ask what he values it at. The possible confrontation is what I would dread in all of it. His character will be in question and it's natural for him to defend his actions. Maybe his conscience is bothering him and the situation can have a good outcome. Mine would've been when your FIL priced it. Couldn't do someone like that.

This is all just my opinion though. Tough place to be in regardless.

I wish you the best.
 
#24 ·
No way this would be a pass. If he is a good friend, which I hesitate to ask as a good friend would not have done this, then you need to take him to task for his actions. If he is NOT a good friend but simply an aquaintance than NOT asking is somethign you will regret for a looooong time. And will probably stick in your gut even more after pops moves on.

So in case you don;t get it......YES, bring it up and I wouldn't worry about being too civil. The guy needs to know how you feel about it. As to talking to your pops about it.....we don't know his situation so cannot speak to that. But if it was my pops, now gone, this certainly would not be ovelooked and forgotten.
 
#28 · (Edited by Moderator)
If you let it go, Karma will take care of it much better than you can.

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#29 ·
This exact situation came up after my Dad passed. My Mother had no clue as to the value of Dad's guns and the new husband of a neighbor lady purchased a Rem. 700 from Mom for $150. He assured her it was a "good deal!" Mom told me about it thinking she had made a good deal on an "old used gun"! I had previously told her to call me before selling any of Dad's guns! After I chewed her out (gently, of course) for selling without knowing the value I told her the scope on that gun was worth more than what she sold it for. Mom was NOT HAPPY!

She confronted the guy about the unfair price he had paid for the gun and the no-longer-friendly SOB offered to sell it back to Mom for the same price. She agreed! She then contacted a cousin of hers to liquidate the collection at closer to market value. Everyone was happier with that solution, except me of course, but I was not in a position to buy any or all of the guns from Mom at that time.

Speak to the FIL about the "market value" of the gun. If he knew and sold it for the low price on purpose, drop it! If he did not, offer to speak to the buyer to see if he will sell it back or pay closer to market price. If the buyer will not "do the right thing", his reputation is severely soiled and should be made public! Those that willingly take advantage of older folks are the lowest form of societal scum and should be outed!
 
#31 ·
In our family we picked out 1 gun so we could remember the person with. OR, we divided them up, 1 person picking at a time, and by if they were going to use them. Most the time, I am the only person who hunts, or uses guns, the guns always come to me. It has never been a large collection, but with my grampa's wood working tools, I knew some were worth ALOT, and some, not so much, so I did research to figure out what stuff was worth, so my gramma could get a fair price for it.
 
#32 ·
what if it was YOUR Father in law? Or your Father? Or your Mother? Or your daughter?
Probably not the answer you are looking for, but any of the above would be contacting me before the sale. If for some reason they did not, I wouldn't feel right telling them that they just made a dumb move. What's done is done. Sometimes we make decisions in life that are not the best and we need to learn from them and move on.

I certainly would make sure they let me know before selling anything else.

If I had sold something for below value due to my own ignorance, I certainly wouldn't be asking the buyer to reimburse me for my stupidity. Once the deal is done I honor it.

And I can tell you this... if it were my Mother or Daughter, that rifle would be in my hands whether he agreed to it or not. I don't like thieves much and I darned sure won't abide anyone stealing from my family.
Now that is ironic. The facts are that this rifle was not stolen. It was sold between two consenting adults. Money changed hands. You taking the rifle without his consent is actually the definition of theft.
 
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